Naming Kids

And what is it with Indians and naming their kids these days? Every kid has a godforsaken name. Wellwishers like me can neither pronounce the name nor remember it, come Christhmas time. "The girl is called Joshana" my sister told me long distance from Seattle, soon after naming her n th kid. "Oh, Jyotsana, that is a nice name." "No, no. It is not Jyotsana. It is Joshana." She corrected me and then proceeded to explain to me how the name actually means Jyotsana, but is still different. Wtf! If it sounds like Jyotsana and means Jyotsana, why can't she call the kid Jyotsana and make it easy on all of us ? Gone are the days when parents vied with each other to lovingly name their kids 'Sanjay - a simple, yet nice name. Now it is each kid to itself. OOf these days it is far easier to remember the kids' Aadhar number than the name itself. Can you imagine our schools and colleges bereft of a Bala or a Srini? And nowadays, epic-oriented names are 'in'. If it is not Vedic and has a sanskritic origin, the name is 'out'. My friend 'Sooth' was telling me about his friend who named his kid after a character from Kalidasa. (That narrows it down to about two thousand names) My friend tried to recall the name, but had total amnesia. After half an hour of trying, all Sooth could remember was that it rhymed with an airlines. Jet ? Spice ? This didn't seem to help. Then he also remembered that it rhymed with a motorcycle model. Could it be Vespa, Kinetic Honda ? Wait a minute, Then he remembered it also kind of rhymed with hot milk and the name was ...Meghdoot ! Fancy name for a brat who looked exactly like a Pazhani or Laloo. Even among characters from mythology, only certain names seem fashionable. What is wrong with a Surpanakha ? (Sue, for short). Kaikeyi will make a nice name. Especially when the whole world is turning into a global village, a name like Kaikeyi will be easily recognized even in China, because it sounds Chinese.